Sunday, February 15, 2009

Janeane Garofalo is a Nazi

Doubtless by now that many of you have seen or heard about the interview given recently by Janeane Garofalo to Ecorazzi, wherein she claims that all people that are conservative in their political beliefs, are assholes to begin with, and that there is something wrong with them. She tells the interviewer that
The reason a person is a conservative republican is because something is wrong with them. Again, that’s science – that’s neuroscience. You cannot be well adjusted, open-minded, pluralistic, enlightened and be a republican. It’s counter-intuitive. And they revel in their anti-intellectualism. They revel in their cruelty.
Now, first, since I'm going to be using her name a lot, and I don't want to keep typing that long, terrible name out over and over again, I'll use her real name instead: Jane. I'll bet she likes that. Anyway, as you can tell, Jane is one of these C-level actresses/comediennes who aren't really funny and who aren't very good at acting, but somehow keep getting paid for it anyway, and then try to act like they're smart on top of it. You can tell she likes to think she's smart because she uses big words and refers to herself as being pluralistic and well-adjusted in the same sentence, something that when you actually understand what you're talking about is philosophically impossible.

Philosophically speaking, Pluralism claims that there are several conflicting but still true descriptions of the world. You will find people that believe in pluralism are the people that think it's OK to cheat on their spouse if they love the person they happen to be cheating with. People who believe this to be true are not people who are well-adjusted. Jane, too, is not somebody who is well adjusted. Somebody who is well adjusted would not have gotten married to her boyfriend as a joke. The reason she feels that she is "enlightened," then, is that she must tell herself that her belief in being pluralistic allows her to be at ease with her own failures as a person. She absolves herself of her defects and considers herself "open-minded" to the ways she has failed.

Since many many conservative republicans are strong family people, with strong marriages and children, who believe in God and work hard every day to grow their families, and would like to see their politicians reflect those same values, Jane considers them "small minded." She goes so far, in fact, to claim that because she cannot personally fathom living her life in such a manner, that Sarah Palin is
successful with a segment of the country because she represents that lesser segment of the country. It’s people’s lesser nature – their human frailty. You know whatever’s wrong with them is what she is about.
Jane seems to think that people enjoy Sarah Palin, not because she's a strong mother with a good family and good kids who's done very well at her jobs and is successful, but because she appeals to all the evil things people care about. Well, in essence, this is true, since Jane seems to think all of the things that Sarah Palin and a great many of the "unwashed masses" feel are virtuous, are in fact evil. It is apparently wrong for people to believe in and love God. It is apparently small minded for people to be married, faithful and have kids; a joke even, to her. People who believe it is right to have these values are simply anti-intellectual. There is something wrong with them on a neurological level.

It seems to me, given the general disdain she shows for them, that Jane thinks conservative republicans are a disease to the human race. It seems an easy philosophical jump that she believes in some form of practicing eugenics, as a method of moving society beyond all those people of lesser nature.

The Nazis were the group that most generously embraced, and most rigorously practiced eugenics, striving for their Master Race of blonde haired, blue eyed Aryans.

Given her propensity to dye her hair blonde, and her lust to cleanse the world of small-minded, anti-intellectual conservatives, it is rational to this open minded intellectual that Janeane Garofalo is a Nazi.

Photo Courtesy of Commenter, Don Miguel


  1. This reminds me of a photo of 'Jane' I used in a post a few years back:

  2. Are you serious? So many things wrong with what you wrote...

  3. But Conservatives are assholes, sweetie, they are pathetic assholes. Indeed, Conservatives are far more pitiful than mere assholes or morons.

    Please visit my Blog: "Conservatives Are America's Real Terrorists"

  4. Sarah Palin is not a good mother. When your 17 year old gets pregnant, you have failed in one aspect of motherhood.

    The religious fundamentalism embraced by the republicans is also flawed. It is easily identifiable in those that you would proclaim to be our enemies

  5. Are the trolls getting paid? They are so busy on the blogs lately.

  6. They are being confronted. They must create smokescreens.

  7. CJP You have by far the most pointless and pathetic blog on the internet.

    Your ramblings are so inane that the monetary value of the bandwidth they take up should be recovered from you with interest and invested in some program that does not prevent your continued blogging but advertises through various media messages which discourage it by pointing out just how lame your activities are.

    Just so we're clear, rather than ever reading your blog again (which I would NEVER do short of being held at gun point and even then it would be a toss up) I would rather read every douche bag celebrity blog or every blog about the boring daily lives of average people where they share things that no one cares about and good sense would normally suggest they don't in the first place.

    You have absolutely NOTHING of value to contribute to contemporary American socio-political discourse.

  8. NikonD, I thought that was obvious just from the name of the blog, not to mention the HTTP address.

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  10. Your satire is crap. Sorry, I can't think of a witty way to put it.

  11. I am no Iowahawk, to be sure, but a lot of people seemed to like it. It is more blunt force satire in the manner of Swift, I'll admit. I don't stab at it too often, but I try now and then.

  12. Dear God, what a dreadful, hateful blog entry. You have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.

    Stick to criticizing her comments if you want to make a point, not her acting. She never said anything about people 'being wrong to love God'... in fact, she's spoken in the past and been quite respectful about believers.

    People who liken social commentators to Nazis are as bad as the Nazis themselves.